Low Riders

Unduly warm for this time of the year. I have a feeling a freeze is coming soon, but who can know for sure? Nature gives us what she will, and we all dress accordingly, despite what we THINK the weather should or shouldn't be.

I bought a new pair of jeans today. I had to settle for a different kind than I normally buy. Usually I wear 'Relaxed Fit', allowing for my ample hips and butt. Come to find out, Old Navy is no longer going to carry that cut. It starts at 'Regular' and works on down to 'Boney Butt'. Also, it starts with the 'Just Below Waist' and ends with 'Don't Have to Pull These Down to Take a Piss'. Because, once you bend over, they just slip off your hips on down to your mid-thigh. Yes, I'm talking about Ultra-Low Waist jeans. What the hell are women THINKING buying this cut of jeans? What was it, exactly, that was SO alluring about plumber's crack that made us turn to the fashion industry and demand that we, too, have the opportunity to ventilate our ass-cracks every time we have to squat down to pick something up off the floor?

I'm happy to say that, though they are supposed to come 'just below the waist', they seem to fit fine. Thank goodness I wear long shirts, that's all I'm sayin'. And for all those other women who are wearing low-riders, perhaps we can all be thankful for you for the unseasonable warm weather.